Skipping Job is Fun!
by Vania1800
Summary: Xemnas & Saïx were on their vaca- uh.. mission for five days. But really, when Saïx trusted his position to Xigbar, a few of his brain cells might have died before all of these. "Xigbar told me to move the ice cream machine! I'm a schemer, not a damn town designer!". Escape and never come back was the best idea, "Las Vegas, everyone?"/"Absolutely." Crack,OrgXIII,Very Light XemSaix
1. Chapter 1

An organized place, without an organized leader and commander, would never make an organized place. I mean, look at their nonexistence castle! White coach, white table, white walls, white bed, white everything, as if they have no other interrior to use. Yeah, well there's maybe a little gray color. But still, what do you expect? A Five star hotel with all those few-colored stuffs?

Then, why did the Castle that Never Was become a different yet cool place? Who knows? There might be a pool or a wifi network or a cash register. But, Tetsuya Nomura wouldn't want everyone to know about the inside of the Organization's Castle. If there is a pool or something like that in the game, it wouldn't be 'Kingdom Hearts' series, but 'Design a Kingdom' series, and the goal would be to make the most awesome castle, cooler than Castle Oblivion, Eraqus' Castle (Land of Departure), and of course, White House.

Now, can you tell why did the Castle that Never Was is a really cool place with those interrior that lack of color? Right, Xemnas. If Marluxia was the designer in the first place, it would not be a castle with lack of color, but a castle with very lack of color, because pink and a very little black would be the only colors in the castle. Of course, eighty-one percent of people chose white over pink.

First, let's thank Xemnas for designed a cool place with only almost one-colored interrior and not pink.

* * *

"Number II, are you sure you can take my place for three days?" Saix was in front of the certain freeshooter, asking for a very important.. quest. "Are you sure you can handle the organization's mission like I am?" Okay, no one can control the organization's mission like Saix always did.

Same as decorations, can you imagine the five days of Castle That Never Was' life without their leader and their reliable second-in-command?

But really, when Saix gave his place to unreliable person, a few of his brain cells might have died before all of these.

Xigbar chuckled. "Hah! I ain't an old man for nothing. I live longer than you. I have many experiences with people. I can handle all of those."

"Well. If it's okay." Saix was started to think that he gave this important... quest to the wrong guy.

"Just enjoy your mission with Xemnas."

"Here."

"What's this?"

"A flamethrower." Saix said. "Just in case since Xemnas won't be here to turn someone into dusk. You can turn them into _dust_ instead."

"Nah. I don't need this. I can handle all those babies. Tell me what to do."

"Alright, I trust you. Now, first..."

* * *

"You heard that, Roxas?" Axel whispered from behind the door.

"Yeah... THEY WILL TURN US INTO DUST!" Roxas replied, shouting unconsciously.

"No, I mean about Saix is ...TRUSTING HIS PLACE TO XIGBAR!" Axel said. "IS HE OUT OF HIS MIND?"

"WHAT?! XIGBAR WILL GIVE US MISSIONS? NO, I DISAGREE!"

"DO YOU THINK YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE?"

"NO, BU-"

"And I expect you to behave, number VIII." Saix said, from inside the room, walking towards the door.

"Hey, Roxas."

"What?"

"Did Saix just notice us and.." Axel peeked inside once again, to make sure his eyes were not lying. "Is he.. come towards us?"

Axel and Roxas needed full ten seconds to react. Luckily, they managed to gain consciousness before Saix reach the door and cut them into pieces.

"Run, Roxas! RUN!"

* * *

"WHAT?!" Larxene shouted loudly. "I don't want Xigbar to tell our mission."

"Neither all of us." Luxord corrected.

The eleven members was in the grey area, since the other three was in the round room.

"Yeah, especially after we prank him last week." Roxas added, "If I know this day will eventually come, I wouldn't tell Axel to dress as Slenderman after Xigbar played the game in the middle of the night."

"What should we do?" Marluxia asked.

"Hah! I mean XIGBAR. X-I-G-B-A-R, number II of the organization," Axel said, "will take Saix's place and give us missions. Are you kidding me?"

"Why him! There's eleven of us that can take Saix's place better than Xigbar!" Xion said.

Silence came. They knew, their Nobody and Replica life will gone for full five days. And if they survive, all they wished was going back to their old Nobody and Replica life. No more Xigbar giving missions.

"Ah!" Xaldin eventually managed to find an idea to save the organization. "Meet up in my room after mission. Discuss everything about Xigbar for the day."

".. Well, that's not a bad idea," Vexen spoke, "I'm in."

The other nodded in agreement. "Okay. Tomorrow, Xaldin's room, after mission."

After that, silence came again.

Everybody in the room was lying down lifelessly, thinking whatever mission will they took. Maybe, suicide is the best way to wake up from this reality nightmare. But, no, suicide is the last resort.

Demyx, the only one who was sitting up and looking at his comrades. Correction, Demyx, the only one who had positive thought about all of these. "Cheer up, guys! What could possibly go wrong?!"

* * *

Well, here we are in Number III's room. Everybody were sitting and lying down, waiting for the remaining members – Axel, Demyx, and Larxene –. You might cannot tell the difference between the dying members or the resting members.

"Well, anyone know, where Axel, Demyx, and Larxene are?" Xaldin, the owner of the room managed to spoke.

"Demyx was probably enjoying his mission. Since he was the one who consider this a great-"

Before Zexion could finish talking, the door was burst open, waking the other members up and showing Demyx and Axel leaning themselves on each other shoulder. Especially Demyx, almost losing consciousness.

"Here comes the positive thinker." Vexen joked, "Tell us what happen. Where did he send you?"

"HESENTUSTOHELLANDHETHREATENUSWITHCELLPHONEAND..AN D-"

"Whoa, whoa, Demyx. Slow down." Xaldin said, seeing the Nocturne can barely talk, managed to choose Axel to speak. "Axel."

"Basically, Xigbar sent me to Atlantica, the place I hate the most; and Demyx to Agrabah, the place he hate the most." Axel said as he let the Nocturne sit down, leaning against the wall, maybe already losing conciousness. "We tried to protest. But of course, it didn't work. Being the upper number is great, isn't it? The Superior always listens to him."

* * *

_– Flashback –_

"Okay, Demyx! In the name of Saix, I give you this mission to eliminate twenty-seven giant heartless in Agrabah." Xigbar said. Oh, how he loved abusing the lower ranks of the organization. Especially after last week's incident. "Also go to the Cave of Wonder. There's a treasure that I've always wanted."

"B-b-but, Xigbar! You know I hate to battle. Send Larxene instead, and send me to Atlantica!" Demyx protested. "I can't stand in Agrabah. It's too hot!"

"Just send me." Axel suggested. "Let Demyx went to Atlantica."

"Thank you Axel! I lov-"

Xigbar let out a creepy smirked. "No Axel. I want _you_ to go to Atlantica."

"Hah! Like why should we have to follow your order, old-"

Xigbar picked up his phone and dial certain numbers. "... Ah! Hello Saix. Axel and Demyx here-"

"Alright! Alright!" Demyx and Axel... gave up. "We will do the missions! Just don't call him!"

A demon, was possessing Xigbar.

_– Flashback Ends –_

* * *

"Then, why didn't you trade your missions by yourselves?" Lexaeus asked.

"Hah, we already tried that, Lex."

* * *

_– Flashback –_

Demyx was standing at Agrabah, feeling the sun burning his body. At the other world, Axel was in Atlantica, dialing Demyx's phone.

_".. Ah! Axel!"_

"You ready, Demyx?"

_"...Yeah!"_

They promised to meet up in the dark corridor and do each other's missions, and come back safely and happily.

And so, they opened the dark portal to the other world, entering the dark corridor.

And of course, they didn't believe their eyes.

"Hello Saix, as I was saying. Demyx and Axel-" Xigbar was in the middle of Demyx and Axel's way to each other, holding a cellphone to his ear and calling a certain member.

"Alright! We understand!"

_How did he get there anyway?_ Of course, that's what in Demyx's and Axel's mind

And so, Demyx and Axel went back to their own world and do their _fucking_ damn crappy original unhappy missions [at least, that's what Demyx thought]. And Xigbar lived happily ever after.

_– Flashback Ends –_

* * *

"HE SENT DEMYX TO DESTROY TWENTY-SEVEN GIANT HEARTLESS?!" Marluxia shouted immediately.

"Yeah, what about you guys?" Axel asked, tiredly.

"Same as you two. Xigbar sent us to the place we hate." Xaldin replied. "And I thought he is my friend!"

"What?"

"He sent me to that _fucking_ yellow teddy bear's place." Xaldin said, holding back his anger. "I was holding my urge to not kill them all. Luckily, I ended up destroying the rabbit's garden."

"He sent me to Disney Town to move the ice cream machine's location." Zexion stated, "I'm a schemer not a _damn_ town designer!"

"Hey, he sent me to Disney Town too! He told me to fix the freezer of the castle!" Vexen added, "And the dog never stopped barking when I'm around! So I froze the dog instead!"

"You froze what?" Zexion awkwardly asked.

"Whoa, are those real missions anyway?"

* * *

In the round room, Xigbar was sitting on the Number I's chair or should I say, the Superior's chair, or I also can say, Xemnas's chair, lazily and calling his.. client.

_"...It's great to work with you, sir. People can finally see our new ice cream machine. I will send the money to you now." _

"Thank you, Mrs. Mouse." Xigbar replied calmly and happily. "How about the freezer?"

_"...Oh! It's working perfectly. It's cooler than when I first bought it. Thank you very much!"_

Life is good.

* * *

"What about you, Luxord?" Axel asked again.

"He sent me to Port Royal. He told-"

"Let me guess, Xigbar told you to gamble with Jack Sparrow, and you won, and he told you to give the gambling money to him, and he live happily ever after." Roxas cut him.

"Correction: I lost and he told me to never come back until I win. The rest is correct." Luxord replied, "Luckily I managed to win at the thirteenth game."

"What about you, Roxas, Xion?"

"*sigh* We had to do all of your missions." Roxas replied. "It means five times tougher than Saix usually gives to us."

"I guess someone has to do our real and original jobs." Marluxia added, "He told me to sent a letter to his old friend. Which I never know."

"He has a friend?" Axel asked. "What about you, Lex?"

"Doing his chores."

"How about you, Larx- .. Hey, where is Larxene?"

Before someone could say anything, the door was kicked forcefully by none other than Larxene. Another correction: the door was destroyed by none other than Larxene. The other was to scared to react when they saw crazy lightnings surrounding her. Then, she started to destroy the shelf in Xaldin's room, then continued by the wall, then the chair, then the lamp, then the-

"Stop it, woman! I just bought those!" Xaldin reached Larxene's hand to stop her. But only replied by a glare that no one can do. If looks could kill, Larxene would be the cause to the end of the rest of Xaldin's Nobody life.

"Sorry, continue."

* * *

Larxene had finally calmed down. Now, Xaldin's room has become 'nothing' instead of 'nonexist'.

"Tell me again why are we in my room?" Demyx managed to gain conscious after that. And he found himself and the other members in his room.

"We can't afford our room to lose." Axel replied.

"Why can't we just tell Saix and Xemnas about this?" Larxene asked.

"They don't give a fuck. As long as the original missions were done by Roxas and Xion. Then, there was no reason for them to get mad." Marluxia replied.

Silence came once again. It's hopeless. There's nothing they can d-

"I KNOW!" Demyx cheerfully shouted, replacing the silence. "LET'S RUN AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK!"

"..."

"..."

"Uh..."

"..."

"..."

"THAT'S A GREAT IDEA, DEMYX!" Everybody in the room shouted in unison.

"Las Vegas, Everyone?" Luxord suggested, smirking towards his comrades.

"Absolutely."

"00:01, three hours from now. We will begin to escape the castle." The Cloaked Schemer spoke, "Pack your things, and bring it here now. Don't let Xigbar spot you."

"SIR, YES SIR!"

* * *

**_00:01 a.m._**

And thus, the escaping plan started.

* * *

Thanks for Reading :)

^^ Please Review, I really need those ^^


	2. Chapter 2

I'm sorry :'(

Please don't be mad at me..

* * *

**_00:01 a.m._**

And thus, the escaping plan started.

"Skipping job for vacation is fun!" Larxene remarked.

They ran at their full speed through Hall of Empty Melodies, Havoc's Divide, and so on, avoiding Xigbar as possible. And after a while, they managed to find their way to the lift without any sign of Xigbar.

"One step to freedom, here we go!" Larxene squealed as the lift stopped, realizing that the exit way is only a few steps.

"Weird," Lexaeus noted, "Shouldn't Xigbar be in our way at least once?"

"Bah! Let's just continue." Vexen answered.

They walked towards.

And, yeah, their worst nightmare appeared.

"Oh, you're not going anywhere."

"Xigbar! How'd you know we're here?!" Zexion stated, since he was sure that Xigbar wouldn't be in their way.

"You thought you'd get away from me easily?" Xigbar mocked, "As if! I told Saix that he can count on me, and a real man never goes back on his words."

"Hah! Look at your place, old man." Axel mocked back, "We have eleven on our side. How many do _you_ have?"

"Demyx, use your water attack!" The Chilly Academic commanded, "Larxene, use your lightning and paralyze him!"

"Hey, hey! I'm just kiddin- Argh! That hurts, Larxene!" Xigbar whimpered as Larxene started to send electricity to him, "As the Number II of the Organization, I command you to agh!- stop! STOP!"

"After you give us that crappy missions? As if!" Larxene mocked him.

"You! Agh- what is this? I can't move!"

"I paralyzed you, dear," Larxene giggled, "Oh! And it seems Vexen managed to freeze your foot."

Xigbar eyes widened as he looked at his own freezing foot, making him more unable to move.

"I'm sorry, but I have to take this for a moment." Larxene picked Xigbar's phone from his pocket, waving it in front of his face and turned it off.

"Bye, Xiggy! Please take care of the castle." Roxas said, waving his hand to Xigbar.

And so, they left the castle with happy faces.

"Wait, why didn't we use portal?" Roxas asked.

* * *

"OW MY GAWD! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! IT'S LAS VEGAS, BABY!" Of course, Larxene and Luxord were the most excited one.

Our eleven lovely members has finally reached their destination safely. And the best thing, it's still seven in the morning after searching for the best hotel. Means, they still had eighty-nine hours or three days and seventeen hours before Saix and Xemnas come back to the castle.

"Room 404.. Room 405.. Room 406.. Room 407! Here we are guys." Demyx opened the door.

And.. here they are, inside the hotel's room.

"Wow, they have hot spring, casino, exclusive swimming pool, and really cool ballroom!" Xion stated as she read the brochure in her hands.

"Yeah, I want to go to the hot spring. Wanna come, Roxas?" Axel asked, walking outside the room.

"Sure!"

Yeah, and the two best friends walked along the hall. This day gonna be the most beautiful day between these two best friends. I mean, c'mon, all they've done was sitting on the top of the clock tower and eating sea-salt ice cream. And if Saix and Xemnas come back, there won't be anytime like this anymore.

"Here we are, Roxas!"

And so, here they are at the hot spring, somewhere in the hotel. They entered the water. There will be no relaxing time after these.. That's what on their mind. It will be the best if they enjoy their time, no mission, no heartless, and no battling.

"Ahh... It's really great." Roxas's and Axel's mind and body were in heaven.

Yes, Heaven.. Until... They.. Heard..

"Superior, are you sure they will be alright?"

"Of course, Saix. What's the worst that can happen?"

Axel and Roxas was screaming like crazy inside their mind. Roxas was going to run out from the spring. But Axel caught his hand and pulled him again, pushing his head into the water. It means, Axel was telling him to: 'Don't make an unusual movement or they will get suspicious'. But, in Roxas' translation was: 'Get down here, motherfucker. Let them notice and we die.'. And so, Roxas went up and pushed Axel's head inside the water. Revenge is sweet, they said. Luckily the steam of the water, is enough to hide their face from the certain nobodies.

"Axel! Keep quiet!"

"You too! Roxas. They will noticed!"

"Superior, I just heard voices that mentioned Number VIII and XIII."

"Saix, this is why I told you to relax here." Xemnas said as he leaned his hand on Saix's shoulder, pulling Saix closer to his own body.

"Axel! They nearly noticed us!" Roxas panicked and looked over the red-head, "Axel, your nose is bleeding."

"Fuck that, let's get outta here!"

And so, they got out from the water, slowly and steady. They needed a full ten minutes instead of one, to get out from the spring. Luckily, Saix and Xemnas didn't notice a thing... _almost_. After making sure their superiors didn't notice, the two nobodies rushed to their hotel room.

"GUYS!" Roxas and Axel panted heavily after they reached the hotel's room and double lock the door after they're inside.

"Lemme guess, Saix is here which is impossible, because you two were-"

"WORST, LARXENE! Saix AND Xemnas are here!" Roxas shouted and looked at the others, "Wait, where is Luxord?"

"Casino." Xaldin replied.

"Figures." Roxas said, "WAIT, WHAT?! WE'VE GOT TO SAVE HIM!"

Now, everybody in the room was running around the room and jumping on the bed, panicked. They realized if they don't move out ,their Nobody and Replica lifes will end here.

"Call him!" Zexion shouted, "NOW!"

Axel, the first one to noticed and moved immediately, picking up his phone and calling the certain member.

_"And that is why they call me The Gambler of Fate.. Please excuse me.. Hello Axel, how's your day?"_

"No time for how's your day, Lux. Get in the room. If you don't, we will die!"

_"... Wha-"_

"Saix and Xemnas are in this hotel, idiot! Get back here!"

_"..What?! Don't play dumb with me, Ax-"_

"_I want the toughest player here." Xemnas said as he looked over the casino with Saix at his side._

_"Oh! We have one here! Mr. Gambler of Fate, there's someone who need your as... wait, where is he?"_

_"Gambler... of Fate?" Saix suspiciously muttered._

* * *

_Please Review, I really need those :)_

_Thanks for Reading :)_


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